MAN IS MAKING A MESS The School of Life

School has started. Officially. With emotions, schoolbags, flowers, speeches, photos and the unfailing promise that education is society's number one priority. In reality, for some children school started with five notebooks, a pen and the explanation that "there is no money". For others, it started a little later, because the sea, the beach and a little more vacation proved more convincing than the catalog.

It is one of those times of the year when Romania suddenly remembers that it has children. We see them everywhere: in photos with uniforms, with bouquets of flowers, with schoolbags bigger than them and with excited parents. Televisions show us schools, classes, festivities, smiling children and teachers who say, with well-practiced seriousness, that a new year full of challenges is beginning. Then, after the festive broadcasts end, the real school begins. And this one looks a little different.

• "I've got you set up, for the moment"

The other day, I witnessed a scene that perhaps says more about Romania's education than many official speeches. In a place where publications, books, soft drinks, tobacco and a few stationery items are sold, a relatively young mother, accompanied by a child of about ten years old, took five notebooks from the shelf.

"I've also got you set up for school, for the moment," she told the child.

The little one tried to protest. They weren't the notebooks he needed.

The answer came shortly: "There's no money, you understand, you make do with what you have."

Here the story could have become one of many about poverty, about parents who have to choose between school supplies and other expenses, about children who start the school year with the bare necessities. But at the checkout, among the five notebooks and a pen, there was also a "cartridge" of cigarettes, that is, ten packs. The cartridge was worth at least ten times more than the supplies. It is not appropriate to turn a scene into a statistic or to judge a family based on a purchase. But the contrast is so strong that it almost writes its own story.

The child is explained that "there is no money". However, the child sees that money does exist.

It just has a different destination. This is one of the lessons that we do not find in textbooks, but that children learn very quickly.

• The first month does not count

However, there is also the other Romania. These days, reports from the sea appeared on television, "the coast for all". Families with children still on the beach, although the school year had begun. Adults relaxedly, sometimes even laughing, told us that they had found a solution: a medical exemption, permission from the teacher, or they simply discovered the belief that the first month of school doesn't matter much.

It is, of course, very possible that a child will not lose the world if they miss a few days. But it's not about a few days. It's about the message. The child doesn't just learn math, Romanian, or history. He also learns from what the adults around him do. If the parent tells him that the rules are important, but at the same time seeks a medical exemption to stay at the seaside, the child receives a very clear lesson about the difference between what we say and what we do. If we explain to him that school is important, but the first month can be sacrificed without any problems for a little more vacation, the child will probably understand that there are important things and "important" things. School falls into the second category.

Perhaps this is one of the big problems that we talk about too little when we talk about education. We like to count the renovated classrooms, interactive whiteboards, European projects, programs, scholarships and measures announced by the ministry. All of them are important. But education also happens in the kitchen of an apartment, when the parent tells the child that there is no money for the notebooks he needs. It also happens at the seaside, when the child is explained that school can start without him. It happens every day, including outside of school.

• School starts when responsibility starts

Maybe we should give up, at least for a while, the festive photo of the beginning of the school year and take a closer look at what happens after the flowers and television cameras disappear. For some children, school starts with shortcomings. For others, it starts with the idea that rules are negotiable. For most, it probably starts simply with the daily routine. And school can try to fix many of the problems that society puts in a child's backpack. But it can't fix everything. Because a teacher can explain a math lesson. He can correct an essay. He can try to catch up with a student who is lagging behind. It is harder to explain why a parent says what he says and does what he does!